Hello... is it me you are looking for ?

Phone calls.. probably the most potent weapon when it comes to relationships. Phone calls can be pretty long you know. When you are growing up, probably 16 or some equally inconsequentially sentimental age, phone calls can last through the night. The fear of an impending exam, or the small euphoria of juvenile love talk.... it really 'connects'.
Anyway, when I was a teenager then we did not have the ubiquitous cell phone around. So there were, lying snuggled beneath layers of blankets (in our respective homes) on cold December nights.. with the curly telephone cords hunched around our necks; speaking in conspiratorial whispers... just the delicious fear of being found talking on the sly so late at night was all the thrill we needed.

Then, I suppose we grew up. After a point of time, phone calls turned into minor battles of the ego... "Why is that it is always ME who calls?? Don't you even care for me".... Somehow, a phone call became a direct measure your affection. In fact, somehow I always feel that my first heart break had simply been because I had been too lazy to call her up as frequently as I should have....

Then, We move on with life. Find new things to do, make new friends, have a new crush. And then suddenly you fall in love again. A long distance one this time. "You lying here... and She lying there" as croons Bryan Adams... Now! the phone calls and emails become indispensable. replying by rote to emails... asking for the well being of each other... and making that weekly STD call so eagerly anticipated and planned for become integral parts of your life. You master saying the most within the least amount of time ..... STD had not been cheap you see.

So far apart, your relationship takes on a Magical aura of almost mythical proportions. You revel in your intimacy without actully meeting each other, each nursing an increasing magical ideal of the other.

Then one day, you land up in the same city. With your hearts singing and cheeks aflame you hook up for a coffee date. Only to find yourself sitting face to face with a person you really do not know so well. The phone calls and emails .... have only managed to fixate you on the image of the person and not the person as a whole.... from then onwards.... your relationship drifts apart.

Hey, I have nothing against people hooking up on the phone.... I myself wooed the girl I am getting married to via SMS's !! It took a couple of thousands messages and a fantastic typing speed to get her into the marrying frame of mind. But a job well done I guess... Anyway, she now complains that I do not send her as many messages as I used to... hmmmm

Anyway, talking is important... more so on the phone ;)

Prolonged silences on either end of the phone run the risk of the following:

1)You are simply not interested and have probably fallen asleep watching 'Baywatch' rather than listening to the blabber on the phone.

2) You have taken offence over some matter close to your heart and are maintaing a dignified silence while reigning in your seething emotions.

3)You have so fallen in love with the voice on the phone that at the moment you are gambolling with its owner in La La Land

4)You are busy making out with someone else and have forgotten to say the mandatory 'Hmm' every ten seconds.

So ... making phone calls should not become your calling in life, unless obviously you work for a call center (yech.. sometimes even I hate my jokes). Baki Baad mein