An Axe Through My Skull...

There is that pain again... creeping stealthily from somwhere around the middle of my spine... converging to form a solid column forcing its way up the base of my neck, digging its pointers through my brain....

Pretty graphic huh ! Some would say Gross ! As usual...

A headache. Painfully similar over the years.... comes back to haunt me on never ending journeys, sleepless nights and hungry afternoons. Makes me realise how I miss having those special people around.

Through my graduation as well as my PG, I always found myself surrounded by people willing to ,literally, lend a helping hand; give my head that lingering, relaxing massage.

There had been the tall strapping Joshi, a junior of mine at the Engineering College. His technique was more to do with brute strength than anything else. For him.... if it did not make enough noise.. it wasn't a good champi. It had been Joshi who introduced me to the magnificent 'Navratan Tel'.... 'thanda thanda cool cool ' aaah....

Time passed.. as it generally does and I found myself in an institute with a higher than normal share of helpful ladies.
Luckily, I too found some.... with quite strong hands I might add.

First there had been Pallo, the pet of our entire group of friends. Always game for a snack in the evening and shopping on afternoons hot enough to keep even scandals inside. Among other things... she has/ had this beautful trait..... All you had to do was to position your head somewhere close to her hands.... (eg, sit a bit lower than her on the staircase... sit on the ground if she is on a chair... do a head-down if she is on the same bench as you are ).... and sooner than later... you will find her unconsciously rubbing your head..... Lovely as it can be..... just had to remember not let her know that you are enjoying it too much... she could have stopped... sometimes did.

Shruti... large, sweet and friendly Shruti... they do not make girls like her anymore. Strength was visible at the first glance... physically capable and mentally devastating. Sometimes she used to decend from her academic perch to mingle with mortals like us. Shruti, was 'THE' authority on ' How to Give a Head Masage'..... strong fingures with a gentle touch. ... forming patterns and trails on your forehead and scalp . Your hair being pulled, gently being nudged at the roots. The trace of your spine being tracked down your neck.. to diverge on your shoulder blades for a parting rub. Shruti... you were the best !

Well and somewhere around had been the girl am getting married to in June... she was never too keen on matrial stuff like a head massage... but did it anyway... still does in fact.

Now ... alone at Hyderabad.. guess its time to head towards the nearest men's salon ~

All I want is a room somewhere... House Hunting !

Over the ages, if you mull through the annuls of human history; human civilisation has enforced some rights of iniitiation for a boy\ girl entering adulthood. The prehistoric ages had the sons being instructed by 'Gurus' in the deepest forests before they returned to a life of luxury in the cities. The Medieval ages had the young men shedding blood in the battle fields of conquests and crusades. Now, they hunt for a house.

A man is not a man enough till he masters the skills needed for an elaborate, long drawn out and eventually fruitful house hunt. It needs the patience of a seaman and the guile of a raconteur.

I, being a veteran of several such expeditions, can well provide a list of my own Do's and Don'ts when you want a house on rent:

1) Have a bath, shave and put on your most modest and decent attire. No one wants a flashy, illkempt, bade baap ka bigda beta as a tenant... more so if the land lord has some girls around the house.

2) Be civil, polite and learn how to smile while the potential house owner launches off on a never ending tirade against the last occupant of the house who never paid the rent on time. In fact, if you are a group of guys planning to stay togther, let the most seedha saadha amongst you do the talking.

3) Be ready for the most unexpected and personal of questions... "Are you a vegetarian?", "Why do you want to stay alone?", "What is your salary?", "What is your caste?", "Are you a devout Hindu?", "Do you drink?", "When will you get married?", "How many guests do you expect for a visit?","Do you think Netaji died in that plane crash in Japan?"...... phew !!

4) Carry identification of some sort... cards , licenses whatever.

5) Appear to be a family sort of a man... it really really helps. Drop glowing references to your parents and your concern for them whenever and wherever you can..."I hope you have a backup generator for the elevator... My father is an arthritic you see........" "Is there and satsang society in this building? My mother is a very devout person"...

6) Wear confortable shoes... you will need to do a lot of walking.

7) Things to watch out for: leaky bathrooms, telltale marks on the door left after the last time a desperate tenant clung to the door before being hauled out of the house... and the like.

Anyway, the kind of house you get depends a lot on your luck. All the above becomes null and void the moment you land a decent place. Pay your deposit and be happy. But remember, that luck always favors the brave....

Bamboo Rice & Hakka Noodles...

Generous amounts of rice, glistening with a smooth coating of oil... slivers of black mushroom, juicy and fragrant, chunks of diced chicken and celery.... all steamed together in a column of woody bamboo.... the result? Bamboo rice.....A smooth smoky taste that takes you straight to a gourmet's paradise.

Caeser is dead ! Long live Caeser !!

People, Nanking has been dethroned as the reigning favorite from my list of Chinese eateries. Welcome, "The Chinese Pavillion"... a small restaurent tucked away in a basement at Panjagutta. A bit difficult to locate... its easy for you to pass by without even realising the what delicacies lie hidden just a stairwell away.

The first thing that strikes you when you enter the restaurant... is the easy ambiance. Lighting is neither dull nor garishly bright... just the right amount of cheerful brightness for an enjoyable meal. The sitting arrangements are adequate for a small group to retain their own space.
But perhaps, it is the service that sets this place apart from the rest. Attentive, quick and unobtrusive.... a combination that is well, pretty hard to find.

I have been to "The Chinese Pavillion" twice... whithin a space of less than a week. Most of their dishes are great.... but honestly, the 'Bamboo rice' has to be eaten to be believed.

The prices are reasonable and the portions adequate. At the end of the meal, you feel... fulfilled.
And yes, the "Honey Noodles with Icecream" is all that a dessert should be.. rich, small and quickly finished.
So here is a toast.. to a place that makes eating out a Real Joy !!

Hello... is it me you are looking for ?

Phone calls.. probably the most potent weapon when it comes to relationships. Phone calls can be pretty long you know. When you are growing up, probably 16 or some equally inconsequentially sentimental age, phone calls can last through the night. The fear of an impending exam, or the small euphoria of juvenile love talk.... it really 'connects'.
Anyway, when I was a teenager then we did not have the ubiquitous cell phone around. So there were, lying snuggled beneath layers of blankets (in our respective homes) on cold December nights.. with the curly telephone cords hunched around our necks; speaking in conspiratorial whispers... just the delicious fear of being found talking on the sly so late at night was all the thrill we needed.

Then, I suppose we grew up. After a point of time, phone calls turned into minor battles of the ego... "Why is that it is always ME who calls?? Don't you even care for me".... Somehow, a phone call became a direct measure your affection. In fact, somehow I always feel that my first heart break had simply been because I had been too lazy to call her up as frequently as I should have....

Then, We move on with life. Find new things to do, make new friends, have a new crush. And then suddenly you fall in love again. A long distance one this time. "You lying here... and She lying there" as croons Bryan Adams... Now! the phone calls and emails become indispensable. replying by rote to emails... asking for the well being of each other... and making that weekly STD call so eagerly anticipated and planned for become integral parts of your life. You master saying the most within the least amount of time ..... STD had not been cheap you see.

So far apart, your relationship takes on a Magical aura of almost mythical proportions. You revel in your intimacy without actully meeting each other, each nursing an increasing magical ideal of the other.

Then one day, you land up in the same city. With your hearts singing and cheeks aflame you hook up for a coffee date. Only to find yourself sitting face to face with a person you really do not know so well. The phone calls and emails .... have only managed to fixate you on the image of the person and not the person as a whole.... from then onwards.... your relationship drifts apart.

Hey, I have nothing against people hooking up on the phone.... I myself wooed the girl I am getting married to via SMS's !! It took a couple of thousands messages and a fantastic typing speed to get her into the marrying frame of mind. But a job well done I guess... Anyway, she now complains that I do not send her as many messages as I used to... hmmmm

Anyway, talking is important... more so on the phone ;)

Prolonged silences on either end of the phone run the risk of the following:

1)You are simply not interested and have probably fallen asleep watching 'Baywatch' rather than listening to the blabber on the phone.

2) You have taken offence over some matter close to your heart and are maintaing a dignified silence while reigning in your seething emotions.

3)You have so fallen in love with the voice on the phone that at the moment you are gambolling with its owner in La La Land

4)You are busy making out with someone else and have forgotten to say the mandatory 'Hmm' every ten seconds.

So ... making phone calls should not become your calling in life, unless obviously you work for a call center (yech.. sometimes even I hate my jokes). Baki Baad mein

Deviations; Diversions; Disruptions

I have been having a series of unbelievably enjoyable weekends. Well guess its time to introduce a new character in my Blog.....
Presenting the one and only, the energetic, instatiable, creative to the extent of being hyper (sometimes) , intelligent, smart (especially with the round specs and the new white shirt), the one with the God given gift of playing all instruments the way mere mortals (like yours truely) play with our work.... The PowerPack from Pithoragarh: Vinay Kumar Bhatt... who apart from being all the above is a very dear friend of mine. Well me and Bhatt Ji ( as we fondly call him) have had some fairly decent times together, and the last few weekends have only added to the list.
Hey, pause a while and ponder over the imponderbales of destiny. I born and brought up in Lucknow land up to study in Uttaranchal. .. meet Bhatt Ji over there, a true blue pahari. What followed was four years in heaven.. then I quit technology and went off to do my MBA in deep Maharashtra. Bhatt Ji goes off to WestBengal to do some even more technical course (HOW :o )

I get a job in Hyderabad Andhra Pradesh... and surprise surprise... Bhatt Ji also lands up at the same place!
Sp having completed a Quadilateral journey across India, both of us meet again in a land so totally alien to both of us.... an suddenly; the mountains did not seem so far away anymore...

Anyway, back to the point... well last week Bhatt Ji came to my house with the burning desire to watch 'Mughle Azam'... a notion that i thouroughly agreed with. So out we went to the Prasad's Multiplex only to find out that the tickets had been completely sold out for all the weekend shows!! Now THAT came as a bit of a shocker, a movie that my parents watched after having stood in mile long queues could still attract crowds Wow. Then came the second surprise... later that night i found myself buying tickets for Rs 100 apiece in black. Talk about history repeating itself. Saw the movie and fell in love with Madhubala and the voice of Lata Mangeshkar all over again. The colours and the music... so fresh, so enduring utterly captivating.....

Well the weekend continued to get better after that. On Sunday, we decided to explore the local Amateur Ham Radio centre. And what followed was an intiguing exposure to something they call the Morse Code.
Dit Dit & Dah Dah.... and people actually make sense out of it all. Wonderfully interesting but at the same time, needs a bit too much commitment for a person as lazy as me. Bhatt ji on the other hand seemed quite inclined to follow up and I have strong suspicions of encountering him mouth "dit dah" and similar ditties on one of these wintery nights.

Ok Ok so this is probably turning into one of the longest entries into my blog... but just a little more left.

This weekend... I bought a guitar. An Spanish one, Givson make, brown and shiny in color. Just to revive my age old dream of playing at least one instrument decently well. And finally, yesterday night... trust me guys... it was a dream....

A place called Taramati ki Baradari. The stage of a courtesan of kings goneby.... beautiful and well maintained. Me and Vinay had gone to attend a concert... Tijan Bai with her folk lores of 'Pandwani'... a Hindustani Classical sinder from Varanasi and finally, Pandit Shiv Kumar Sharma. Music , the way you seldom experience. An evening I so wish I could relive....

180 Nights and 180 Days....

So its final... clear as shining star on a summer night, as inevitable as a daydream... marriage. six months from now I will let go of the only way of life i have known till now. and suddenly.... its a pretty sobering thought.
Marriage, does that take away your license to have fun at the drop of a hat. Or does it make you more..... responsible. Or does it guarantee you a constant companion for the rest of your life; whether you like it or not I might add.
So does the notion of waking up in a room clutterred with beer bottles, ash trays, used paper plates and empty savory bowls suddenly become unaccpetable overnight. Or does a night with the guys and the bottle become a taboo. Whatever... the point is like that people do get married ... and some of them seem to really enjoy it as well. So here is hoping that I manage to land up among those lucky ones... Amen !!

Dreams.... the most extravagant to the killingly mundane

Well at the moment i have just received a package from my fiancee with the following articles:
A Beatles CD
A Book on Cocktails

So, I have pretty much every reason in the world to be hopping around on one feet. Anyway, just drives home the fact that it has been an extremely suppressed dream of mine to be a Bartender at some swanky joint. And not one of those staid ones... (though being one like Jeeves) would not be so bad) but rather one of those stylish ones. Who can miraculously juggle up an amazing 'Bloody Mary' with just the right dash of Tobasco while they jiggle away to the loud loud music, toss an Olive into a Martini without spilling a drop and lend a comforting shoulder to a desolate soul on a bar-stool... Paragon of perfection, poise, composure and skill. Ultimate...
Taling of dreams yet unfulfilled........... well i wanted to go on a trip across India before I began my career... visit all those places in Megahalaya with names as musical as windchimes... maybe just laze around on a Goan beach in a shack... alone??? maybe.... but once in a while it would be good to talk to her while sitting on the sand... the breeze closing in on us both. Whew... thats getting a bit personal....
Ok I want to sit in in the driver's cabin of a steam locomotive.... want to be an excellent swimmer. Be a respected teacher giving lectures on esoteric topics across the world. Would love to sing professionally.......... even try my hand at being a Master Chef.......
Hey. money still hasn't figured in the list. Not because it is not important.. but because that is an implicit requirement. though honestly, have never been able to linger on the thoughts of money (or the lack of it sometimes ;))......
Dream of writing a book or two.... start an organization to help the old and the aged. Learn to play the guitar............... fantasies and fantasies and more.
"Hazaron Khwahishe aisi ki Har Khwaish pe dum nikle"

Favorite movies...

Ok ok ok... maybe I come from a generation which considered it intellectually inferior to watch too many movies. But come on... there are too many good movies floating around to escape having some favorites!
well I love those old musicals.... of the genre of "The Sound of Music" and "My Fair Lady" or maybe "Casablance".
Another movie.. made sometime in the 1970s called "Hello Dolly" is also one of the movies that I have probably watched a zillion times.
Talking about movies.. any movie with Julia Roberts is always a sure hit with me. Agreed though that she is not the best actress around but she definitely is the most charming. "My Best Friends Wedding", "Mona Lisa Smile" and of course " Pretty Woman". There is something infectious about the way she laughs.... reminds me so much of someone I know (guess its an open secret who)....
They once made a movie call.... "Thoda Sa Roomani ho Jaye".... most people will not recall the movie.. well it had been an atempted musical from NFDC. Had an excellent sequence with Nana Patekar... when he describes the rhymes and reasons for 'Water'
Descriptions... words .. probably leave the most lasting of memories on my mind. The way Higgins describes the English language in "My Fair Lady" or Mel Gibsons ending sequence in "The Patriot"....
Well here is an opinion for whatever its worth... Heroes seem great on screen because whatever they say with passion seems to be heard by ever character around them with considerable belief and respect. While when we say the right, logical, rational things... no one really bothers around us. So, the guy on the screen inspires and awe... though honestly.. I am yet to meet many people who can make me feel similarly in real life.........
But there had been one.... We used to call him 'Baap' at SCMHRD

A Farewell...

This one goes a bit away from the run-of-the-mill stuff I generally write over here. Its been 4 months since I joined my current project. Perhaps it needs to be mentioned that it is also my first...
So there I was, hesitantly setting up my desktop. a bit wary of asking favors from strangers. then suddenly out pops a face from behind my Cubicle wall. A round face, round specs and a long long braid .....and a bindi firmly afixed in the center of her forehead.
"Ashish, will you please join us for our project party today?"
Madhumita, our track lead... the backup project manager and the uncrowned Quality queen for our division. And thus, I too joined a score of other people working with and under Madhumita. Over a period of time... I learnt whatever I know about my job till date from her. Admired and took inspiration from the quality and quantity of her work. And now that she resigns from our company and moves ahead with her life.... I wish her all the best and say a heartfelt "Thank You Madhumita"!!

An impending marriage, crashing servers, absconding maids... peace

Been a long long time since I wrote something here. Anyway, had all the reasons in the world to actually just go off on a trip to nowhere. Got engaged, to a Tamil Iyengar Brahmin who refuses to accept an MCP for a husband and smiles indulgently at my many faults. I shudder to imagine what evangelistic thoughts race through her mind whenever I am in the middle of describing a night with the bottle. It is a bit funny though, she used to find the things i said in my druken stupor endearing when i was a college guy in dirty jeans. Maybe thats acceptable for a guy who is broke most of the times... not one who is supposed to be on the verge of becoming a family man.
Talking about family, i am reminded of my workplace. Seeeeeeeee !!!! 6 months into a job and the phrase family connects to the office of all places. Generally, its a fairly routine place to be (my office)........ but sometimes it can be a lot of fun. Like today, when we are having a ball because the clients' server crashed.

In fact, crashing systems make a lot of business sense for the company as well. I present my case hence forth:

1) Crashing servers lead to project delays, in a time & material project this translates into the client being billed for one more working day per person. That gives you a whopping incremental amount for your revenure at no extra cost.

2) The company gets to show off its disaster recovery system to perfection to the client. Otherwise it only remains a lifeless piece of information on paper waiting for a tropical storm to destroy all buildings in the developed world... or maybe a neuclear holocaust or two.

3) The employee morale gets a major boost. trust me , no-one is happier than an IT guy when servers are crashing on the client's end.

4) The case study to be prepared for the given contract becomes a lot more interesting to read. Anecdotes can actually be even more priceless than the end product itself... "The Area Sales Manager for XYZ accessed his system on the D-Day to find all his data erased !!! However, we (The Company) took just an hour to restore the system. the needed data was delivered and the meeting was saved!!! Yet another moment of client-company bon homie; Yippeeeee!!!

Yeah, i guess sometimes my derision with IT shows through. Anyway, staying alone can actually result in some unforseen problems all around. My maid refuses to to cope with the odd hours i keep and threatens to quit every second day. The dhobi takes my clothes and conviniently forgets about my very existance till the next weekend. I guess that is more troublesome to the people around me... who wants to sit next to a guy wearing the same set of clothes for the entire week!!

Had been on a trip to delhi for Diwali. Had an interesting journey. Had been travelling in a second class sleeper coach... AP Express. The train was supposed to start from Hyd at 6:30 in the morning... that meant I had to wake up at the unearthly hour of 5:00 AM. It also happened to be one of those painfully rare mornings when i saw the sunrise at Hyd.
Once i reached the Secunderabad Railway station, triumphant and proud of my early arrival, my enthu was dampened somewhat by the annoucement sayig that the AP Express was delayed by 30 minutes!! They say, "Punctuality is at best a lonely pleasure', and i So totally agree with them.
Anyway, the train was full of the regular culprits one finds presnt in train compartments in any part of the country. My immediate neighbour was a middle aged lady from Kerela... Elizabeth Kurien. "Call me Mona, that is my pen name' She charmingly introduced herself while i did the yournger-polite-guy-sorts duty of pushing her bags (Three) and a bedroll (One) under the berths. "Pen-name" ?? I said. So i had a man of letters with me (Or should that be a 'woman' never heard of that phrase). Unfortunately i made the mistake of vocing my doubt... the next thing i knew . Mona was handing me a bunch of small booklets; ... "Its a long journey, you can enjoy my shers on the way!! And there i was, stuck in the middle of some sentimental trash feauturing heaving bosoms and unshed tears... and a chase maternal woman offering to share her food with me... alonwith all her unread repertoire. Mona came across as a failry lonely soul. A rich businessman for a husband who by her own accounts is hardly ever at home.. and a married son settled abroad. i have a her phone number with me, and a promise to call her up once i return to Hyderbad. Guess neither matters.

Education and similar inconsequetial stuff...

my education has seen a constant state of decline... my schooling was done at a 120 year old institution called Colvin Taluqdars' College. heritage, traditions, you name it the place had it in exuberant abundance. quite a start for your academic career. anyway, the rot started right from the moment i entered a new college... hardly 7-8 years old. forget about traditions... the college did not even have well defined rules. Kumaun engineering College... that was what it was called. nestled snugly in a remote Himalayan Valley, the college kept away most of the world's capitalist tendencies... in other words basically that meant no placements, no amazing salaries and sometimes a seriously unambitious crowd. what it had in abundance was beauty and lethargy. i am yet to meet a KECian who has not been super lazy at least in part.
chilly mornings to sunny afternoons to breezy evenings.... you name it we had it at KEC. classes, well yeah they were also there... amongst other things; like enoromous spiders, brawls with local villagers, RAGGING, stale samosas and an annual Sialdah Mela.
to me kec would always remain the place that took away my fear of speaking in public... and to some extent singing.
KEC also meant friendships... wonderful, beautiful, enduring friendships...

that was my college... then for my PG i entered an institute which was hardly a year old... SCMHRD nasik. the rate of this perpetual decline of educational standards suggests that i should do my PhD as the first batch of some institute in Bihar!!!
SCMHRD... well more about it some other time...

A dusty old City... Kebabs and Henna tipped fingers

i was born in allahabad, an ancient town at the confluence of two of the mightiest rivers in northern india... the Ganges and the Yamuna. however, i was brought up in one of the last bastions of Nawabi culture in India... Lucknow.
Lucknow... the name itself invokes memories of lanes and bylanes. shops piled high with fruits... crowded market places and evenings filled with the smell of spices and flowers. Lucknow...a city that forgot to move ahead with time. Dusty and grimy... and so totally laidback.
to me the most exciting aspect of Lucknow had always been the eateries... and there had been so many in number. till date i am yet to get over my facination for Seekh Kebabs glistening in coal fires, Golden Parathas, steaming Kormas and aromatic Pulaos.

Shopping in Lucknow is not a routine activity... in fact it is one of the major sources of cheap entertainment. Muslim women in hijabs of various shades of Blue, Black and white can be seen haggling with Pujabi shopkeepers. only their eyes visible through the veil..... agitated, angry bright with passion. occasionally, a hand with henna tipped fingers would emerge from the swathes of cloth and examine the ware.
Lucknow... its been 6 years since i left the city for my studies. yet, i yearn for the relaxed lifestyle so common in that city

There is always a first time...

there is always a first time dont you think? something as romantic as a first kiss....or as mudane as the first haircut. Mundane did i say? well "First" of anything is never unaccompanied by excitement.
Halt!! think of something that you did for the first time and were not excited by the thought... or maybe just a bit nervous. whatever it was... it could just never be mundane.
so here i am... a bit excited and a bit nervous... with my first ever attempt at a Blog.
I am Ashish... a consultant in one of India's leading IT companies (anyway there are too many of them floating around now).

just felt like talking a bit...... hence this blog.
some great guy said.... The coolest things in life are what others say you cannot do... i think writing stuff which someone will wanna read is one of them. till next time tata